Having a baby is one of the hardest things a woman will ever do. I have not had the experience of a vaginal delivery, but I can tell you that both of my C-sections were beyond painful, both physically and emotionally. I know for me, I tend to want to jump right back into my usual routine and not skip a beat, but the truth is, that just isn’t possible after a C-section. Knowing and accepting your limitations and being gentle with yourself can make the recovery go that much smoother.
Take Time To Heal
You just had major surgery, do not try to be all things to everyone. It is our mom instinct to jump in and care for our baby the second they are born. The truth is though, God gave a baby two parents for a reason, and you need to take full advantage of that when you are recovering. Let your husband bring you the baby for feedings. Let other people change the baby’s diaper (I know you will really be upset about that one). Rest as much as you can so that you can be the best mama to that baby in the near future, your baby needs that and you need that.
Let People Do A Meal Train For You
If you are not familiar with a meal train, it’s a meal calendar where all of your friends sign up to deliver meals to you and your family during times of need. I hate accepting help and to feel like I’m putting people out, but the truth is, you cannot cook after you have major surgery, and you and your family have to eat. When your friends offer to drop off food instead of arguing with them, simply say “OK.” People want to help and what better way than sharing their favorite meals with you. The best part is, that they usually drop it off at your doorstep, so you don’t have to feel obligated to play hostess. It’s a small gesture that goes a long way, a really long way.
Allow Yourself To Go Through All The Postpartum Emotions
You just had a baby, survived a pregnancy, and went through a traumatic delivery, you are not going to feel like yourself. You will question your capabilities as a mother, your place in the world and what the future looks like, and that’s alright. Cry for no reason. Laugh for no reason. Have a breakdown. Have quite a few breakdowns. Having a baby is hard, and raising it is even harder, allow yourself to feel and do not feel guilty about it.
Do Not Put Pressure On Yourself To Lose The Baby Weight Fast.
It took you 9 months to gain the weight, give yourself almost that much time to lose it. The postpartum period is not a time to count calories and obsess about the scale. The weight will come off, I promise. And if it doesn’t, oh well, you brought a human into this world and that is the ten times more amazing than a pair of size 4 jeans.
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Enjoy The Baby
Instead of going through your to-do list constantly in your head, just hold that baby and soak up all the love and that sweet baby smell. They are only newborns for a short time, you have the rest of their lives to get things in order. I had a music playlist I would put on repeat, and all I did all day was rock and love on that new bundle while listening to some sentimental tunes. I cried. I laughed. I gazed into my baby’s eyes and thought, “I’m the luckiest woman in the world.” Those moments are sacred.
Get Rest While You Can
This goes hand in hand with “take time to heal.” Do not exert too much energy, and just take the time to rest. You did it: that baby is on earth, safe and sound. Now just get some rest and find the beauty in the idle time. It won’t be long before your baby will have a ton of demands, but all it needs now is to eat and sleep and you should do the same.
Having a new baby is overwhelming and consuming, and often times the future seems uncertain, but I can assure you of this: your life will be 100% richer and motherhood will transform you for the better. Be gentle and patient with yourself, you have an entire lifetime to try to get everything right. The moms who act like everything’s cupcakes and butterflies after a C-section are lying. You just do you and soak up every little moment that you can. That is what it’s all about.