I don’t care how much you profess to love your children and to be a super-mom-who-never-needs-a-break, we ALL need some time to ourselves; it’s just a fact. And by “time to ourselves” I don’t mean a trip to the grocery alone or a 30-minute pedicure once a month. All that does is give us a little boost to make it through the remainder of the day.
I’m talking about a real break.
One that involves shuffling your children to God knows where, an overnight bag, and an advanced reservation.
I just recently went on a girl’s trip for four glorious nights.
Yes, you read that correctly.
I left my husband and children to fend for themselves for five days and four nights, and I didn’t flinch about it. Of course, I had anxiety leading up to the trip and had a running list of things that could, and probably would go wrong.
What if no laundry or dishes gets done, and I come home to maggots and urine-stained-sheets?
What if my husband forgets to bathe the kids for a week, and takes them to their three kiddie parties in mismatched outfits?
OMG, what if no one feeds the cats and they resort to cannibalism? No really, can this happen!
I could literally drive myself crazy with all my “what-ifs,” but there comes a point where you have to let go, for your own sanity. Once I boarded the plane and the wheels went up, I felt a weight lifted off of me. It was like I could breathe again. I was able to sit back, relax, and I began to realize that this vacation wasn’t just a luxury; it was a necessity.
When you spend your days watching Baby TV, and giving stickers to your toddler for taking a dump on the toilet, you almost forget that you have a college degree. I forget I actually have something intelligent to contribute to a conversation. I got to talk with other moms about things we never get to talk about when we are with the kids, and it was a breath of fresh air.
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We all need some uninterrupted “me time”, whether we want to admit it or not. Time away from your family gives you a chance to do things that you don’t get to do at home. My days were filled with long walks in the mornings, coffee on the patio, and reading books on the beach. I didn’t need anything extravagant; All I needed was time to be alone with my own thoughts, and no one pulling on me.
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, and I totally agree. In turn, I was able to step back and focus on the positive aspects of my marriage. I wasn’t thinking about how he left his dirty socks all over the mother-loving-house, or dishes in the sink (Ok, I was a little but I knew I was being irrational). I was thinking about how wonderfully he was interacting with the children when we FaceTimed. Or how awesome it was that he not only allowed me to go on this trip alone, he encouraged it. Now, that is sexy AF. I seriously fell in love with him all over again.
If you do not take a break from motherhood once in a while, you will go insane. We try to be everything to everyone. Sometimes we lose perspective on what is important, and the little things become big things. Taking a break made me realize that a lot of the things I worry about are minute in the grand scheme of things. So they don’t listen often and do the opposite of what I ask, but they are still good kids at heart. With each passing day of your much-needed-vacation, your kids become little angels. You begin to miss them, every part of them.
By the last day, I was recharged and ready to get home. I actually missed those little monsters.
So, if you’re feeling tapped out, and have been on the fence about taking a much-needed vacation from your life, take the leap! You won’t regret it. You should never feel guilty about taking time to yourself so that you can be the best mom and wife to your family.
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