People Reveal The Things They Learned When They First Moved Out Of Their Parents’ House

Moving out of your parents’ house for the first time is something of a bittersweet moment. That especially rings true for today’s millennials, many of whom were forced to move back home or delay striking out on their own in the years following the Great Recession. A combo of crushing student loan debt, rising rents, and flat wages has made it more common for young people to crash at Mom and Dad’s much longer than they’d like, according to the Pew Research Center.

But if Reddit is any indication, extra time with the ‘rents doesn’t mean you won’t face a few surprises when you finally do leave the nest. In a Reddit thread, users revealed the moving out lessons they learned when they first got their own place. The entries are equal parts hilarious, practical — and a little bit scary. Some users were surprised at the upfront costs of stocking an apartment with necessities like spices and cleaning supplies. Others were shocked to learn that tap water isn’t free. Many more had a rude awakening upon learning a decent meal doesn’t just materialize out of thin air.

Whether you’re looking for kindred spirits or want to plan ahead for your own first apartment, below are some moving out lessons from Reddit you’ll want to remember.

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1. Groceries Are Expensive, Y’all

When you lived at home, chances are the kitchen was chock-full of food, like delicious leftovers and ready-to-go snacks. But like user harleegentry, you probably never paid attention to how much money your parents spent to feed everyone, including guests. As it turns out, that can all add up pretty quickly.

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You don’t just have to buy your own food, either.

You have to actually think about what you want to eat, as user sleepingArisu pointed out. That said, living on your own means you won’t be beholden to traditional meal choices or times. For example, Redditor Mitosis enjoys the freedom to eat spaghetti for breakfast if they want. “Who’s gonna stop me?” they asked. Here’s another of many moving out lessons: no one is going to boss you around, and you can eat whatever the heck you want for breakfast.

2. Being Sick Is No Picnic When You Have To Take Care Of Yourself

Having your parents nurse you back to health is an underrated perk you’re sure to miss, as user theoptionexplicit confessed. Sure, in the advent of food and grocery delivery services, you can still get by on your own when you’re sick, but that can add up fast. Plus, isn’t it nice having someone to take care of you? We think so. This is one of the hardest moving out lessons to swallow.

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You’re especially out of luck if you’ve yet to stock your medicine cabinet with basics like Advil or Pepto-Bismol.

You mean we have to buy these things before we even need them? How rude! Consider keeping the basics at home just in case you fall ill quickly, or have a neighbor or close-by friend ready to help with an errand or two if need be. You can return the favor when you’re better.

3. Making Actual Phone Calls Is The Worst

That dentist visit you’ve been putting off? You’ll need to make the appointment yourself instead of relying on Mom to do it. The same goes for when you need a car tune-up or your A/C is on the fritz. And no, you can’t ask a parent to call you out sick from work.

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Even finding a new doctor in the first place is a chore.

User GumboldTalkatalvi said he hasn’t seen one since he moved out — three years ago. Raise your hand if you think doctors and other service providers should communicate by text only. Fortunately, there are some text-based medical services, but in other areas, you may need to brush up on your phone etiquette and start dialing.

4. Dishwasher Detergent And Dish Soap Are NOT The Same Thing

I’ve personally experienced the dreaded result of putting regular dish soap in the dishwasher. In my defense, I only used a tiny bit — but it was enough to turn my kitchen into a DIY foam party. It was like that episode of I Love Lucy, except way less entertaining, since I had to deal with it.

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After spending hours cleaning up a gigantic soapy mess, I never made the same mistake again.

Pro tip: If the dishes are dirty and you don’t have enough dishwasher detergent on hand, just wash them by hand. Trust me on this one. If hand-washing dishes makes you gag, you can attempt to make your own dishwasher detergent with a tiny amount of dish soap and baking soda, according to The Huffington Post.

5. Long Division Really Was A Waste Of Time

The number of words in the U.S. tax code has more than doubled since 1985 — and no amount of high school calculus can prepare you for filing your own tax return. Since you’re no longer considered a dependent on your parents’ taxes, though, it’s time to figure it out this whole tax thing. This isn’t just part of moving out lessons, either; you should learn about taxes as soon as you start earning a paycheck.

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The IRS’s Volunteer Income Tax Assistance (VITA) program offers free tax prep services if you earn less than $54,000 per year, according to NerdWallet.

You can also take advantage of the IRS’s Free File program, which can score you free tax software if your adjusted gross income is less than $66,000. Take some time to educate yourself on taxes so you can get the biggest tax return possible. If you are making a considerable amount of cash, consider hiring an accountant to help you find all the write-offs and credits for which you can apply.

6. Crashing On The Couch After Work Isn’t Always An Option

Chores are probably the last thing you want to do after a long day at the office, at least according to user Kuromeru. But that doesn’t make them any less of a necessity, unless you don’t mind living in squalor. And it’s not just a once-a-month cleaning situation, either.

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You’d be surprised how quickly dust and dirt accumulate — on literally everything.

If you are making the big bucks, you can hire a cleaning service to keep your abode welcoming. If you aren’t in that situation, consider having a chore schedule. This can help you keep your home nice and tidy without having to spend hours cleaning up every day.

7. Everything Costs More Than You Think It Will

There’s a reason your parents asked “Were you born in a barn?” every time you left an outside door open: it’s because the cost of heating and cooling your home can quickly spiral, especially in the summer and winter months. Just ask user aquay, whose first electric bill was nearly as much as their rent payment.

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Fortunately, there are ways to cut down or budget utility bills.

If you’re facing high utility bills, ask your provider if they offer budget billing. This lets you average your utility costs over the year, so you pay the same amount each month. It’s not a replacement for setting the thermostat to a reasonable temperature, but it can help you avoid a financial emergency.

8. Having Extra Toilet Paper On Hand Is Never A Bad Idea

We’re pretty sure there’s nothing worse than going to the bathroom, only to discover you’re out of toilet paper when it’s time to wipe. Sure, there are… workarounds for this type of situation, but wiping with a stray cotton ball or whatever other material you can find nearby can get gross, and fast.

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To avoid this seemingly common conundrum, user tlock8 recommends buying TP in bulk at a warehouse store.

Is a Costco membership the truest mark of adulthood? Certainly seems like it. If you can’t afford (or fit) bulk products in your home, you can always set up automatic purchases from Amazon or other online retailers to keep a regular shipment of toilet paper, toothpaste, and other hygiene essentials you don’t ever want to go without.

9. That Spider Won’t Take Care Of Itself

Chances are you had a designated bug killer in the house when you were growing up. Once you move out and on your own, though, it’s up to you to squash those spiders, beetles, or — the horror! — cockroaches, as user damnit_joey points out. We are already feeling squeamish thinking about it.

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You don’t want to have to ask a friend or neighbor for help getting rid of a creepy crawler, do you?

Keep a few bug sprays on hand for dire situations, but make sure they’re safe for your pets if you have ’em. Sometimes you can’t avoid having pests in the house, especially if you live in an older building, but keeping your place clean should help keep bugs at bay.

10. It’s Up To You To Call Grandma

User jflo1636 is right: Staying in touch with extended family members is tougher than it looks. You might remember to call Mom regularly, but what about the aunt who’s recovering from surgery? Or the cousin who just got engaged? Or what about your sister who just finished her thesis? Not all moving out lessons necessarily have to do with keeping up your new pad; they have to do with keeping up your relationships.

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Take a page from my playbook: Schedule calendar reminders to call your Grandma (and everyone else) every couple of weeks.

It doesn’t sound like much, but spending a few minutes on the phone will probably make her day. You might be surprised at what it does for you, too. We may be a generation of texters, but getting on the phone once in a while will be a breath of fresh air.

11. You Might Get A Little Homesick

It’s easy to romanticize the freedom you’ll have after moving out of your parents’ house. But a common theme in the Reddit thread was the loneliness people felt living away from home for the first time. User barelylocal wasn’t the only one to confess one of the moving out lessons they learned was that they missed their parents.

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“I moved into a studio apartment by myself in a new state and coming home after work was pretty sad,” user VincentStonecliff wrote. “I called my girlfriend at the time or my parents every night. If I didn’t I felt mega-depressed.”

Lots of Redditors suggested getting a pet to help combat the solitude (as long as you have the means to take care of it!). Some choose to live with roommates, which can help with both potential loneliness and with keeping your rent from being astronomical. There’s nothing wrong with visiting home often, either.

12. You’ll Need To Get Your Own Wi-Fi, Too

Binge-watching your favorite TV shows is another way to fill that extra free time you’re experiencing. According to a study by Country Financial, three out of four Americans share streaming, shopping, and mobile accounts such as Hulu, Amazon Prime, and Spotify. We aren’t the only one with an ex’s HBOGo password, right?

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If you’re lucky, your parents will continue sharing their Netflix password.

That said, you could score your own membership for as little as $8.99/month. It might be time to pony up the extra funds and stop getting recommendations based off whatever your parents watch.

13. Your Credit Score Is More Important Than You Think

You’re probably aware that your landlord ran a credit check before approving your rental application. But did you know potential employers can request a modified version of your credit report during the hiring stage? Or that your credit score affects how low (or high) your interest rates can get? These moving out lessons just got real.

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A LendingTree study found that almost four in 10 Americans had “no idea” how their credit score is determined.

Knowing how your credit score affects your life is an important skill you may be lacking when you first strike out on your own. Luckily, a quick Google search can turn up millions of resources you can check out. Be careful not to compulsively check your credit score either, as that can cause it to go down.

14. There Is So Much Junk Mail

All those credit card applications you’re getting in the mail? They’re just a drop in the bucket compared to the other spam that’s sure to fill your mailbox. It wouldn’t be such a big deal, but an overstuffed mailbox means that important mail may not make it to you on time. Plus, you know, the environment.

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Thankfully,  The New York Times reports that unsubscribing from snail mail is “almost as easy as unsubscribing from email spam.”

Opting into paperless statements from companies you do business with is a good place to start. You can also unsubscribe from catalogs, advertisements, and other types of mail with the simple click of your mouse (or phone). Visit DMAChoice.org to remove yourself from entire mailing lists. Who said each one of these moving out lessons was hard, anyway?

15. Why Are There So Many Laundry Settings, Anyway?

Remember when Rachel did her first load of laundry on Friends? You might have laughed at her incompetence as a kid, as you likely weren’t in charge of doing your own laundry. Now, however, it’s easy to see why she was so confused, once you take a look at the various dials on the washing machine.

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For example, what’s the difference between “tap cold” and “cold”? Is ironing really necessary?

Moving out of your parents’ house means fending for yourself, and that includes doing your own laundry. If you don’t want to ask for help, try this how-to guide to avoid ruining your wardrobe. It’ll cost way more than you think to replace it. If you’re in a rush, you can always send out your laundry, too, which can get a bit pricey.

16. Adulting Is Just Plain Hard

Millennials get a bad rap for being entitled, lazy, and immature. No other generation needed moving out lessons! Some older generations might think. But there’s a reason why “adulting” found its way into our daily vernacular — because it’s hard. And we don’t just mean it’s hard because it is something new or different; millennials are navigating a much more volatile landscape than previous generations. A lot of these moving out lessons seem rudimentary, but it can be hard to tackle all these things when you are overworked and underpaid.

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The truth is that becoming an adult during the Great Recession means millennials face a unique set of circumstances.

So if you find yourself struggling with the daily responsibilities of living on your own, take heart. If Reddit has taught us anything by now, it’s that you’re not alone, and you can always count on the internet for more moving out lessons.